Dead Roses

roses-are-dead-violets

You are waiting, almost comically, for this to just wither and die.

Death of a friendship. Death of a relationship. Death of an internet connection.

Just let it fade into the sunset, fade to black, go away completely. What you went through, in reality, was just a spring fling. A lot like that winter fling. And see how far you’ve come with that? It’s not like you sent him dead roses because you aren’t still hurt.

Lying to yourself is your favorite thing to do.

You’ve also discovered they never met their maker. The Hale Bop Dead Rose Comet never reached its intended recipient. I thought for sure I’d have gotten mine on that little stunt. But, hey, guess what? Joke’s on me.

Some things just you have to let go.

Said me, never.

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Vessel Rentals

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It’s in the things that go untold
That gives us wrinkles and folds
Of truths we never spoke
Or lies we carried on
For our own pride
That ate us away
On debts we wish paid

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Paper Dolls

It’s a facade;
It’s all painted on.
The more I wear,
the more I hide,
the more attractive
you think I am.

At the end of the day
it all comes off;
I’ve been me the entire time,
just not the me
you want to see.

A cardboard cutout
of a girl who doesn’t exist.
A fake,
a phony;
an actress nodding and agreeing,
silently rebelling
against who you perceive me to be.

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These eyes

The best thing about what’s behind these eyes is that no one knows what’s there but me.

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Earning My Wings

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My things aren’t up on the walls. My clothes are all over my room. This is the third time I’ve moved in the past 2 months. I almost don’t want to get comfortable. This place does feel a little more like home than any of the other places I’ve been recently, but I still have to tip toe.

Tip toe in the dark – can’t use extra electricity. Wrong door, yours is two steps to the left. Forgot that table was there with the stuff on it. Onto the hard floor it goes. It’s late and I’m tired and I’m making all kinds of noise.

I’ve hung all of my jewelry on my door and every time I open it, they clink and clang, and inevitably a ring or bracelet or one (just one) earring goes flying to the floor. It’s so loud when it hits too, I can’t stand it. But I pick it up and put it back and wonder when I’ll be able to afford buying those stupid sticky things so as not to put a hole in the wall to hang it in a proper spot.

There are too many fucking wind chimes here. Way too many. I haven’t counted, because 1 is too many, but they all sound different and they all clash with each other, making the wind even more unbearable. I don’t need to hear the wind every time it moves.

And the dogs, just like the last place; the moment you get out of bed to take a piss in the bathroom down the hall, they bark as if they forgot you were there to begin with. Rude. I don’t bark when they go pee. Maybe I should.

Constant barking when you arrive, when you leave, when you shit. And the scratching. So happy to see you they jump and scratch. When is the last time you scratched someone because you were so happy to see them? Never? Me too.

And the neighbor’s dogs. Bark. Just bark. And let’s put some bird seed in the bird feeder so we can watch the cat try to get the birds with a bell attached to his neck. So much noise. So little flying time.

Maybe I should be a pilot so I can just fly the fuck out of here. Look down on the morning traffic and thank my lucky stars I’m not in it. Watch the accordion effect of stop and go traffic and whoosh by the closure on the freeway that has everyone else on the freeway in a tizzy. Not me.

Fly. Just fly right on out. No wind chimes. No hairy pets. No barking, whining, poop to pick up. Just me and the controls on my way to Bermuda. Or Aruba. Doesn’t matter. Just fly.

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No Woman (Or Man), No Cry… (Dating Philosophy) – 10 Old fashioned Dating habits we should bring back – http://wp.me/p3zWCt-2rU

Eat Me

red lips

With red lips
And cat eyes
You can’t see my mind’s eye

What you see
Is not what you get
For I have to be stirred yet

Make me laugh
Make me smile
Inside I’m burning wild

True love
Is found in the wilderness
As I feel your first caress

And taste your lips of berry sweet
Mind red
Supple to eat

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The Silence

The Silence by MarieTaylor - DeviantArt

The Silence by MarieTaylor – DeviantArt

Silence
Like a cancer grows
The quiet making me forget
All I wanted
And everything said
I want to forget it all
And be loud in my head

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Spade Dreams

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Five feet long and six feet deep
I dug my own grave in my sleep
Spade in hand as I climbed down
Remembering her hair; flowing brown
Feeling the dirt around my feet
This isn’t supposed to be me
She wasn’t the first, and I won’t be the last
Please let me shovel fast

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Sweater Weather

sweater weather

I want to disappear
From this world and from my fears
Of being lonely and cast aside
Trying in vain to protect my pride
It’s the price I pay
For letting you have your way
The same mistake made over and over
My winter just became a little colder

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Linda G. Hill

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